This morning I am a purple cat with blue spots. How to translate that? My art journals always reflect how I'm feeling. I'm doing better. I'm emerging from a tough time back into my purple self. (Check my hair color for literal translation!) I look for signs in my behavior. It's not just that the raging pain is subsiding, it's the fact that I've gotten fully dressed, that I desire to put on my makeup. It's tidying up spaces that became cluttered when I was too exhausted from the anxiety to do so, it's (yes) coloring my very overdue hair. It's laughing with my best friend at the plant stand (a low stimulation outing and thank you Randy Thomas ), then coming home with an absolute hunger to pot my plants. It's dirt under my fingernails and the happy accomplishment. That dark, dark place of intense anxiety doesn't last forever, and it's always important for me to remind myself. CPTSD is powerful, but I am stronger! Love yourself first and love others and know that if you're in it, it will not last forever.
Love, Cheri
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